Littoral

There’s a itch that, no matter how much I scratch it

Or try distracting myself

It’s there like omnipresent-won’t go away-just-you-try

And no matter how many steps (quick footstep watch the ground)

It won’t

won’t

A splinter I can’t find so I start digging away at my skin/flesh

It’s there I swear it is

I can feel it, experience it, it absorbs me

But I can’t

see

it

So it’s back to

step, foot, foot, step [footstep]

over and over, just to distract

just so something else in my head is there

otherwise I’d just feel

the tick-tick of inveitability

of this stupid pain

sensation

overwhelem

And you know it’s so frustrating

because if I could just find it, see it, touch it, locate it

I’d rip it out and discard it

throw it a million billion infinite miles away into the sky

into space

where it would shatter, disperse into the void

never to

be

seen

again.

It’s simply something I can see out of the corner of my eye

You know, when you think you’re seeing it but you turn around and – voila, it’s not..

And then I turn back and it’s there

Compelling me to notice it

Opaque, tugging for my attention

Look at me, look at me, look at me

But I can’t because it’s not actually there

It’s almost dormant

But when I try to switch of

It’s look at me look at me worry about me worry please worry

It’s entirely fallible logic locked away in a huge piece of amber

Every time I run-run-run away

There’s a swell of grey, choppy, violent

Over the hills but not far [away]

I have an abstract notion of control of the fear

Certain actions pause proceedings

It’s dark down here

It’s quiet in this cave

I can hear you high above [muffled]

There is no concept of duration

There is no thought of raise

No thought

I spy the monster over the hill

Breath in the air

You don’t scare me [you do]

You don’t control me [you do]

You don’t own me [you do]

I don’t scare you [I do]

I don’t control you [I do]

I don’t own you [I do]

Criss-cross pitter-patter

Mud sludge grey shift

Empty space

Void space

Spiral [down]

Mist [missed]

lack of rhythm [missed]

cobalt, pyrite

Three layers of dreams

antagnoized

wake [up]

Two layer of life

sleep [daze]

Opening, closing, locked

key [jam]

one layer of end[ing]